"When You Come Back Down"

A theme song for motherhood.

I remember exactly where I was the first time I truly listened to the lyrics of “When You Come Back Down” by Nickel Creek. I was driving by our local park with my babies—still in car seats—in the back, and the song hit me right in the gut.

The narrator, sung by Chris Thile, is singing to his newly grown child who is getting ready to go out into the world: “You got to leave me now, you got to go alone. You got to chase a dream, one that’s all your own, Before it slips away.” He reminds his kid, “When you’re flying high, take my heart along. I’ll be the harmony to every lonely song That you learn to play.”

And then the chorus:

When you’re soaring through the air
I’ll be your solid ground
Take every chance you dare
I’ll still be there
When you come back down.

It’s a song about staying connected and a song about letting go. It’s about tamping down your fears as you celebrate your child’s independence and the mixture of pride and sadness you feel as you watch them walk their chosen path without you. For them to become whom they were made to be, we have to let them go. That’s the thing about parenting—from the moment our children are born our job is to work ourselves out of a job. We teach them how to take care of themselves, and then cheer them on as they launch into their adult lives.

By the time Thile got to the bridge, I was a mess. Ugly crying, y’all.

Your memory’s the sunshine every new day brings
I know the sky is calling
Angel, let me help you with your wings

In that moment I realized this was what all my efforts at mothering were working toward—that moment when I’d help those babies in the backseat put on their wings and fly away from me. It was such a profound realization it shaped how I approached everything with my kids. What do I need to do to get them ready for this exact moment?

Friends, we have reached that moment today. Abby is graduating from Georgia Tech this morning with a degree in Mechanical Engineering and has a big job waiting for her in Tennessee later this summer. She is ready, and I can’t think of another single thing she needs to know from me. I would say we got here too fast. She would likely counter with: it wasn’t fast enough. But here we are just the same.

And I am so very proud of her and the vibrant, accomplished woman she has become.

You got to leave me now, you got to go alone
You got to chase a dream, one that's all your own
Before it slips away
When you're flyin' high, take my heart along
I'll be the harmony to every lonely song
That you learn to play

When you're soarin' through the air
I'll be your solid ground
Take every chance you dare
I'll still be there
When you come back down
When you come back down

I'll keep lookin' up, waitin' your return
My greatest fear will be that you will crash and burn
And I won't feel your fire
I'll be the other hand that always holds the line
Connectin' in between your sweet heart and mine
I'm strung out on that wire

And I'll be on the other end, to hear you when you call
Angel, you were born to fly, and if you get too high
I'll catch you when you fall
I'll catch you when you fall

Your memory's the sunshine every new day brings
I know the sky is calling
Angel, let me help you with your wings

When you're soarin' through the air
I'll be your solid ground
Take every chance you dare
I'll still be there
When you come back down

Take every chance you dare,
I'll still be there
When you come back down
When you come back down

WRITERS
Daniel J. O'Keefe, Timothy Page O'Brien

To the Georgia Tech Class of 2024 (many of whom are part of the Sweet Tea community): I am over the top proud of you! You moved into dorms freshman year in the middle of a pandemic, and you dealt with it. Football games, fraternity parties, sorority formals—you’ve done it all. You’ve laughed. You’ve cried. You’ve taken care of each other. You have resilience and grit, and YOU HAVE MADE IT through one of the most difficult universities in the country. Pat yourselves on the back. You are rock stars!

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Today is May 4th, an illustrious day in the Jacobs household. Not only is it Star Wars Day—May the 4th be with you!—and not only is it Abby’s graduation day, it is also my Cancerversary (if you know you know). Two years ago today, my surgeon healed me of cancer by cutting it from my body. I have been NED (no evidence of disease) ever since, and for that I’m deeply thankful. While the five-year endocrine therapy medication I have to take to ensure all cancer cells have been eradicated makes me ache all over and move like I’m 120 years old some days, every day I am healthy and strong and this, too, shall pass. Thank you for your prayers and support. I appreciate each and every one of you.

Until next time,
Karla

PS: I will always celebrate my Cancerversary by reminding you to get your mammogram or encourage the women in your lives to get their mammograms. Early detection is vitally important, and a routine mammogram saved my life. Don’t put it off!